What Makes You Feel More Comfortable?
By: Kayla Zuidersma
What makes you feel safe? Is it the people around you or the location you are in? Do you feel relaxed and safe when you are familiar with the people that are in the same room as you or are you a social butterfly and get along with just about anyone? Are you a quiet little house mouse and enjoy the peacefulness of your home or are you more of a busy body, out and about and always on the go? Are you and introvert or an extrovert?
At this point you’re probably wondering why I’m asking all these random questions……and it’s because your “sacred space” will one day become your birthing space. So what does your sacred space look like to you and how does it make you feel safe?
Your sacred space will one day become your birthing space.
So lets create a sacred place together……Ask yourself some of the following questions……
Are you a people person?
Do you like groups of people or prefer one on one?
Do you like surprises or security?
Do you easily trust others or does it take you a little extra time?
Have you ever experienced physical or sexual abuse?
Do you remain calm or feel stressed and panic in unknown situations?
Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
Are you a home body or like to stay busy?
Is home your safe place or can you make home anywhere?
In times of stress do you want to be alone or want to have others to confide in?
I know a lot of questions right…..but hear me out for a second. These questions really do help you better understand whether you would be better having a midwife or OB and whether or not you’d feel more comfortable having a hospital birth or a home birth.
I’ll give you an example….
I’m a big people person but I’m very much an introvert. While I may do well in large groups of people I prefer one on one. I like surprises but also like security. I have a hard time building full trust with others and that may be because I have experienced both physical and sexual abuse growing up. While I can remain calm in stressful situations, when it comes to myself physically needing treatment or care I panic when in a hospital setting. I am a huge home body. I love my home but also like to keep busy. My home is my safe place and often the people in my home are those I confide in when I am feeling stressed or burdened.
You see, although I don’t like surprises and like security and do well with other people my sacred space is very much defined by my home and small group of people within my home. This is why after having a hospital birth with our first we knew we would have a much better experience with a home birth. Home birth was what I needed in order to be able to birth my baby safely and calmly.
Not everyone will find peace and security in the thought of a home birth and that’s totally ok. But I encourage you to ask yourself the above questions as you prepare and make decisions based on the options available to you. Knowing yourself will help you better create a sacred space that fits your needs.
Obstetrician or midwife? Hospital birth or home birth? What will you choose?
The following link will provide you with some basic information about care providers and birth location: